Zoom: How do I Look?
Then there’s my hair. Today I put a comb on top to hold back the overgrown front part. I think I’d look better in my zoom square without the comb. How weird will it be if I’m seen arranging my coif?
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HEALTH/SAFETY
And Now the Dishwasher Conversation
My older sister’s job was rinsing them and mine was loading them schmutz-fee into the dishwasher. My brother’s job was being the only son.
THE FAMILY SPONGE CONVERSATION
For me, hand-washing a glass sparks certainty that the next morning my cold brew will taste like Lemon Joy; I depend on the dishwasher for dishes to be fully rinsed. My middle daughter believes the reverse. She thinks dishwashers leave soap residue and will make her coffee taste like Cascade.
Happiness Tip
Did I really become a complacent worrywart because of a Times reader’s tip? If so, how much effort must I devote to the New York Times’s comments sections to solve all my problems?
What Do You Think About When You Are Not Thinking About Anything Else?
To find out what I’m thinking about, I decided to track my thoughts. But it doesn’t work when your paying attention, like just now I was washing my hands, so for this exercise, I noticed myself saying to myself, “I’m washing my hands.”
Airline Bumping, Circa Mid 90s
“Come here; I just want to talk to you,” she sings in a tone that belies daggers. Two flight attendants are poised by the cabin door, ready, I am certain, to slam it behind me.
Homeless Lives: Unforgettable Personal Stories
Sometimes the writers go home and work on their stories. Well, they don’t exactly go home, because many in the group are homeless.
Beijing and Bicycle Conundrum
It’s a Beijing conundrum because I don’t want to support the stolen bike industry by buying a new, used, probably stolen bike.
Ski and the City
Not everyone has as much attraction to strangers as I do, but if you do, with skis and the city and a camera, you have a great excuse.
Worry Pastiche
Surveys showed that one in twelve listeners believed the story was real and that Martians were invading New Jersey.
Stranger on a Train
Regret is one of my least favorite feelings. In a few minutes I would be switching trains, and the opportunity to help this stranger on a train would soon expire . . .
Reversals
That Greta’s son had set parental controls on his mother’s computer gave me more than just a chuckle; it gave me a jolt, reminding me of the parent-child reversals I had been noticing more and more in my own life.
Highway Safety: Truckin’ With Trucks
A truck driver once told me that his instructions were: if you think you are going to hit a car with, say, a family in it, then try to kill all the occupants, because the financial settlement would be lower than if they lived.
Freaky Friday in Laos
y very presence seemed to bring out the worrywart in my adventuresome Eliza, as though every day of our time together in Laos were Freaky Friday, as in the film of the same name in which mother and daughter find their personalities exchanged.
What Are Your Favorite Food Moments on an Ordinary Day?
What do you eat on an ordinary day? Maybe I’ll find that mine are not quirks at all and that everyone drinks a pint of tea in a Pyrex measuring cup before bed.
Public Toilet Mishaps
This of course led me to one of my common ruminations: What would be the cutoff for retrieving a precious item from a public toilet?
Antidote to Worry: Frozen Banana and Melted Chocolate
Antidote to Worry: Frozen Banana and Melted Chocolate
Casey at the Window: My Dog’s Quality of Life
How do I measure my dog’s quality of life? A dog whisperer on TV whispered a guideline for when to euthanize your dog: when bad days outnumber good days.
Antidote to Worry: Lettuce Wraps
With bathing suit season approaching, everyone seems to be more calorie conscious. Lettuce wraps are one of my favorite snacks.
Worried About Too Many Advisors
What am I to do about too many advisors? I began preparing for the 2-minute pitch of my memoir 60 days in advance, an average of 1 day for every 3 seconds.
Explosions at Boston Marathon Finish Line
In light of the Boston tragedy, how can I publish my trifle of a post, which—on a day when we felt safer and less heart-heavy—might make some readers smile?
Antidote to Worry: Easy Dinners of Adobo Chicken (and Sharing)
As easy dinners go, this is the easiest. All you need is 4 ingredients.
Worried About Outliving Friends, My Junior High School Boyfriend and Not-so-Subtle Self-Promotion
All this fed into my recurring imaginings of how to celebrate my death, and whether to do so after or before it occurs . . .
Cute Guy in Van: A Washington Story
A Washington Story: What if he’s a terrorist? He’ll know where I live. Better to remain inconspicuous.
Confessions of a Worrywart: Husbands, Lovers, Mothers, and Others
“Susan Orlins is America’s funniest neurotic since Woody Allen. Just be careful you don’t crack a rib reading her memoir, Confessions of a Worrywart.”
Sticky: 13 New Year’s Resolutions for 2013
For a worrywart, it is challenging to come up with just one resolution when there are so many choices. So I have selected several from my 2012 grab bag to inspire you to worry less and indulge more in 2013.
Sad
But why isn’t anyone talking about campaign finance reform?
Biking in Beijing: LING LING!
I didn’t see why that was so funny, until they caught their breath and told me . . .
Two Falls and One Worrywart
Suddenly a skinny, little girl—of perhaps seven years—broke free from her family and darted in front of my bicycle.
Tip Day: Have a Plan & Have a Roll of Bubble Wrap
Even before 9-11 I wondered what I would do if confronted with the terrifying choice to either jump or burn. Ideas came to me this morning before I opened my eyes.